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Why He’s Afraid to Say “I Do”

1238327_79257252I found this article on Woman’s Day Thought I would share it you. Looking at it from a man’s perspective there is some validity to reasons. In the end however it is an individual reason and may only be one. Then again it could be them all. Either way I think it is best to discuss whatever the concerns are and make sure thiey can be overcome.

 

8 things that terrify men when it comes to marriage

 

By Woman’s Day

Surprise! Staying committed to one woman for the rest of their lives isn’t husbands’ biggest concern. They did freely choose to get married, after all. But that doesn’t mean your man is fear-free about marriage. Issues like putting him second in your life and bashing him with your friends may scare him. “Husbands’ fears are rooted primarily in rejection and self-consciousness,” says licensed marriage therapist Carin Goldstein, creator of BetheSmartWife.com. Read on for eight common fears husbands have about marriage, plus expert advice on how to ease them.

  1. He’ll be on the back burner.

With kids, jobs and more vying for your attention, it’s easy for a husband to feel like he’s second best. “As marriages progress, men often feel that all they’re good for is a paycheck,” says Julie Orlov, psychotherapist, speaker and author of The Pathway to Love. To remind your husband that he’s still important to you, Orlov suggests carving out 30 minutes of one-on-one time each day with no talk of kids, in-laws or money.

  1. You’ll turn into your (or his!) mother.

He loves the charming qualities you possess that remind him of his mom—like your superhero parenting skills and incredible work ethic—but he doesn’t want (or need) two mothers. Likewise, there are probably a few things about your mother that get on his nerves. And many husbands worry their wives will inherit those characteristics, says Karen Sherman, PhD, author of Marriage Magic! Find It, Keep It and Make It Last. She suggests acknowledging the situation with something like, “I know my mother annoys you sometimes. Let me know if you notice me doing those same things.” It’s a simple way to allay this fear. Continue reading